Hot Hot Hot Hot Hot Hot

A week ago the only thought that prevented me from putting myslef in an oven was that I was coming back to Malaysia. Now I'm thinking of putting myself in the frigde. It's fricking hot la...

I wake up at seven in an air-conditioned room with my pajamas drenched in sweat. I take a nap later in the afternoon only to find myself waking up because my shirt is drenched with sweat. I take three cold showers a day because let's face it, turning on the water heater in this weather is plain insane. I only drink water from the fridge and I've been switching on both fan and aircond in the afternoon. An yet it's still so hot that my nose has bled for the past three days.

I think I'm going to melt into a human puddle. Please, take me back to Adelaide. I don't care how. Buy me an air ticket, stuff me in you backpack, disguise me as a suitcase and check me in as your luggage, chop me up and fit little pieces of me in different bags, smuggle me past the airport secuirty. Whatever way you think is best. As long as I don't have to stay in this crazy place with its insanely hot weather.

And the Award Goes to...

I made a very important discovery today:

Jumping around the house with stiches in your mouth screaming "AAAAHHHHHH" because you're happy is NOT a good idea.

I think I deserve a Nobel Prize.

The Dentist

One of the reasons I came back to Malaysia was to eat. Heck, it was the only reason I was willing to submit myself to one whole month of sweltering under the scorching sun. But, it looks as if I'm gonna be sweltering without doing much eating at least for a week.

Because I went to THE DENTIST.

And took out two wisdom teeth.

The top one was infringing on my lower gum.

And the bottom one was inbedded one inch deep in my jawbone.

Oh, the utter dismay! when THE DENTIST said "give me the long needle".

Oh, the horror!! when THE DENTIST took out his mini saw.

Oh, the pain!!! when THE DENTIST sawed and pulled and tugged and lauged at my anguish.

Oh, the agony!!!! when THE DENTIST gave me a RM 660 bill.

I'm beginning to wonder whether it was worth it to pay that much so that I could drool all over myself because I have absolutely no feeling in the left part of my face. Plus I can't eat. Nor talk without sounding like I have a golf ball in my mouth.

The only thought that comforts me it that at least the forced diet will help me loose some of the pounds I've packed on in the past four months.

Magic Fingers

I have magic fingers. Like Dr. Elliot Reed from Scrubs has magic breasts. Only my magic fingers doesn’t increase the heart rate of a comatose patient. They cause me to freeze in the living room.

Let me explain.

Ever since I came to Adelaide, I’ve unintentionally damaged things. Unfortunately, the things I’ve destroyed have all been electrical appliances. Here’s the list of stuff so far.
1. My room light. I switch it on and *poof*. No more light
2. The bathroom light.
3. The porch light
4. The room light of a certain housemate. And this time, these magic fingers really worked their magic. Lets just say that by the time magic fingers had finished with the light bulb that she was trying to save, the wires connecting the light bulb to the ceiling had snapped and there was a household blackout because the electricity tripped.
5. These magic fingers were not only contented with spoiling lights. Freddy’s phone was next. I did not mean to break of one of the buttons. Really.
6. Then there was my brand new laptop. Magic fingers somehow managed to mess up the sound system. I had to watch silent movies for a good few weeks.

But, the lights were fixed, and these magic fingers of mine didn’t cause them to fuse anymore. Freddy got a new phone and my laptop sound system started to work again. Things were good. Until today.

Magic fingers destroyed light bulb in room. Again.

So I’m out in the living room, freezing my ass off typing this until somebody replaces the bulb for me because I don’t think I wanna cause another blackout.

At least not until exams are over.

Conversations with a friend

Me: Eh, I’m coming back to Malaysia.
C: When you coming back?
Me: On the 25th. Remember to put red carpet for me ar.
C: Hmmm. Remind me.
Me: Sure, I’ll tell you again later la.
C: Ya. Ya, remind me. Remind me so I can forget.

The Blogger Min

Finally. I’m an official blogger. After living my life for 20.9 years writing in the occasional diary that would inevitably vanish after a couple of weeks - and when I say vanish I mean totally disappear, never to be seen or heard of again – I’ve decided that I would do something different (Well, at least something that won't pull the dissapearing act on me). So, here, with syllogisms, I present to you my highly excellent deductive skills to illustrate why I’ve decided to take it upon myself to waste cyberspace.

Syllogism One
Premise 1: If I have a blog, then certain people who have asked me to blog will stop their
persistent whining.
Premise 2: I’ve started a blog
Conclusion: Therefore, the persistent whining will stop.

Syllogism Two
Premise1: If I blog, then I won’t die of boredom in Adelaide.
Premise 2: I don’t want to die of boredom
Conclusion: Therefore, I blog.

Syllogism Three
Premise 1: My sister has a blog, my cousin has a blog, my cousin-in-law has a blog, my friends
have blogs
Premise 2: I don’t have a blog and I have a bad habit of wanting what I don’t have
Conclusion: Therefore, I want a blog.

Syllogism Four
Premise 1: Bloggers are cool
Premise 2: Some people are bloggers
Conclusion: Therefore, If I am a blogger, I will be cool.

Yeah, I'm beginning to think I'm not very good at dealing with peer pressure. But who cares. Here's to a lifetime of squandering cyberspace!