Holding on with the very tip of my fingers

This blog has failed to be the therapeutic release that it was when i first started. Perhaps due the readership of the blog, or perhaps it's because I don't have the time nor energy to type up long and interesting stuff. Still writing offers one of the best ways of release that doesn't involve buckets of tears or finishing up a friends' gas tank.

It's been a tough week since coming back from Cambodia (hence the lack of pictures of the trip). It amazing how a sudden turn of events can turn my insides upside down. It's unfair that it's happening. I didn't wait this long for this to happen. No Way Jose. Then again, life happens right?

Sometimes we can keep so many things inside us that when we want to speak bout it we don't even know where to start anymore. It festers and grows and eats us up but because there's just no one to talk to it remains where it is. And we just learn how to live with it.

We get so used to it that when we try to open up we can't.

Because just whispering it out to the winds might change everything we've ever known. Because saying it out loud means that we're not as strong as we think we are.

Because letting it out means admitting that we're a broken people. Because it will mean that we'll have to deal with it.

Still, in the midst of it all, letting it out means dealing with it. And dealing with it means breaking free and moving on. Moving on to the plans that God has for our lives. Moving on the greater calling of God.

And that's what I'm going to do. Move on to what He has called me to do.

I surrender all.

Broken hearts
Broken dreams
Unfulfilled desires
Shredded hopes
Nothing else to do but surrender
Because I know that you care
You laid down your life, mine, it's yours
Tell me what to do
I'll wait for you to speak to me
I'll wait