Holding on to His promises....

Amiss

2010-03-02T15:34:00.003+10:30

Something is missing. Something is amiss when I can't type a decent sentence on anything. I am tired.

2009-11-14T15:01:00.001+10:30

1/2 hours more.

eergh

2009-11-12T15:41:00.002+10:30

2 more days working here.

Aarghh.

I need to shop.

I shall go shopping.

I shall go shopping on Tuesday.

I shall shop on Tuesday till I drop.

I shall shop for clotes, I shall shop for Christmas presents, I shall shop for no reason at all.

Hahahahah. Oh Jam dinding di office aku, cepat lah pukul lima.

Ikea-no

2009-10-26T15:49:00.002+10:30

I never ever want to go to IKEA ever again.

Not on weekends anyway...

Say, its payday...

2009-10-24T14:42:00.004+10:30

That means a load of maths for me to do. AHHHHH I love the person who invented calculaters.

People seem to work for money and nothing else. I have still not come across anyone in my workplace who actually like what they do. It just seems. Purposeless.

And when they've felt like that ever since they started working, the lack of purpose becomes resignation.

Resignation to a mediocre life.

I'd rather fail at trying to do something I like than succeeding at something that leave me empty at the end of the day.

Purpose.

Makes a whole world of difference.

And makes the whole world different.

Purple Paint Plan

2009-10-22T15:16:00.002+10:30

I shall paint our house PURPLE!

Shhhh!!! Don't tell Matt!

Hahahhahaha.

houseeeee

2009-10-20T15:20:00.003+10:30

Ahahahahahaaaaaouse. We've got our house! (finally).

And now I cannot stop looking at the IKEA catalouge. It's driving me nuts.

IKEA gift cards for Christmas are welcome.

75.

2009-10-19T17:45:00.002+10:30

The Wedding. Is. 75. Days. Away. And Samson farted in my face. A silent killer fart. When he was sleeping.

Days are moving pretty fast. Resignation has been tendered in. And I seem to have lost the ability to fully process my thoughts. These days find me falling short of pretty much everything. I’ve known for a long time now that I don’t know everything. Admitting this is not difficult. It’s the learning and navigating through the ‘don’t knows’ that’s difficult.

We seem to be a generation that has lost the ability to admit our wrongs. We point fingers when things go wrong. We toot at the mistakes people make and criticize those who don’t live up to our seemingly excellent standard.

Most of the time we refuse to learn, pushing tasks we need done to others, while we lose our tempers and give killer stares to those who can’t fulfill our requests.

We have lost the capacity of being meek.

Maybe we’ve lost this capacity because being meek in this dog eat dog world will probably cause us to become dog meat. Maybe we’ve lost it because we’ve never in our life seen someone being meek.

We have been taught to be forceful if we want our way. Force your way into that car lane, they sure won’t let you in if you don’t. Who cares how she’ll feel, as long as she buys what I’m selling. It’s her fault if she doesn’t know how to say no. Strong people get what they want.

You can only succeed if you play the game. Wanna get to the top? Step on some toes girl, who cares who those stilettos of yours injure. Forget being nice. Nice guys finish last, remember?

Meekness equals weakness.

Contrary to be meek and weep, the word of God says “Blessed are the meek for they will inherit the earth”.

Being meek is a sign of strength. Being meek means turning the other cheek when we are wronged. No, it doesn’t mean we let bad people carry on with wrong doings. It just means knowing when to keep quiet and when to speak up. It means caring about how people feel. It means loving those who are bent on hurting you. It means loving the unlovable.

It doesn’t mean we let others step all over us. Being meek doesn’t mean we sit at the back and slide down the chair because we don’t feel good enough. Being meek is not being inferior.

It is knowing that my God is Big. It is knowing we are where we are because of Him. It is knowing we are His children because of what He has done. Being meek is the realization that without Him we are nothing, but with Him, all things are possible.

Inherit the earth? Surrender first.

Ponder

2009-09-25T14:36:00.002+09:30

With seemingly little time to do a whole bunch of things, these days leave me with little time to ponder and mull over things that are happening. Each snippet of time is precious. (Especially time to sleep!)

I counted the number of days left till D-Day - 99 days left to a whole new chapter. I am amazed at how time flies, and with camp and Christmas in December, it barely leaves us 2 months to get all the wedding preparations ready (Scream!!!). More importantly though, I find myself thinking bout some of the things I need and can learn in three monhts. Already I've learnt so much in the past three months. I've learnt more about myself, I've learnt more about Matt. Heh. More and more to learn each day.

Still, I guess the best teacher is the one above. And I try, strive daily to be the wife from Proverbs 31. And fall short of it. Hahahah. Nevermind...I'll get better each day :D

With so many things to do and work taking up 12 hours of my day, seems like the days really just go by like whirlwind. Or maybe whirlpool, sucking everything to the depths (hahahh so dark!) I'm getting more and more excited bout the wedding, I'm learning to appreciate each day as it is.

Hmmm..... What's today going to bring I wonder?

Fat Sam

2009-09-10T14:34:00.002+09:30

Samson is VERY fat and I cannot wait for Raya holidays anymore... pleaseeee give me holidayyyy. I need holidayyyy.

Psalm 91:14
Because he loves me, says the Lord, I will rescue him, I will protect him, for he acknoledges my name

:)

Checklist

2009-09-07T14:26:00.002+09:30

Wedding Venue - Check

Dress - Check

Shoes - Check

Hair & Make up - Check

Bridesmaid dresses - Check

Wedding favors - Half check

Guest list - Check

Invitations - Half check

Reception people - Check

The Groom - Check, check, check hahahahahha

I am working on a public holiday.

I am freezing in the office.

I am blogging during lunch hour.

Maybe I shall feign a heart attack and get to go home early. Hmm. Sounds like quite a good idea, except that I'm not a very believable actress.

I need choclate. Choclate ice cream, choclate cake, chocolate chocolate chocolate.

Chocolate Bear.

Choki Choki.

Told my senior wanna stop work end of the year. Said he also wanna stop work. Hahaha. Work here blood pressure become zero. Coz all the veins also burst. Very good. No more people in HR. No human resource in the Human Resource Department. How ironic.

Insanity. Shop Shop Chicken Chop. Pork Chop. Lamb Chop. Karate Chop.

Artline Ink Refills are really smelly. So are Smelly taufu.

I need sleep. Alot. Alot. ALOT. Maybe take MC tomorrow.

Life will never be a box of chocolates. Coz I'll eat up all the chocolates. Hahahahha.

Chocolate chocolate. Hmmm Hersheyssss.

Shoes i need shoes.

My goodness, I shall never again type out the things that go through my hear. I sound like a madwoman. Maybe being madwoman not so bad. Can have mad hair without feeling the mad plunge in self esteem.

The proposal

2009-08-24T23:05:00.002+09:30

I've got lots of things to do but I just need to get this out before anything else otherwise I can't concentrate.

Officially engaged, the moments of yesterday are still so dear to me, and I'll hold it close and treasure it for the years to come. Precious moments like these make life worthwhile.

So yesterday, after being told by my sister that there was a surprise for Matthew and I, I willingly climbed into the car with three noisy boys who took me to some mamak stall. Haha. And i was thinking what the heckkkkk.. make me dress nicely then bring me go mamak then I'll have that awful mamak shop smell. Anyway.. after half hour, they finally decided to leave and got their butts back to the car.

Then in the car, a request for me to put on a blindfold was met with a NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. After lots of coxing from the future bestman, the blindfold was finally put on, and I had a good time making noise and whacking the people in the car. And I super tried to wind down the window and yell for help. I remember somehow thinking about wanting to eat Sugus for some reason.

Upon arriving the walked me into the elevator and up, up, up we went. Till the 17th floor where Matt BLUFF me lo. Said that he was also blindfolded. Ish. Then was taken into the sky lounge - and I still had NO IDEA what was going to happen! Kau Blur la. the whole of Ipoh, KL and Adelaide also know, but I dunno - and took off the blindfold. I saw all the family and friends we love there, and my trusted brain decided not to work, and STILL the thought of proposal DIDN'T enter my head.

Then there was the big box tied up with ribbons which he asked me to cut. And purple and white helium balloons floated up with the card saying "Mindy will you mary me?" (the balloons didn't really float up.. but i was too overwhelmed to notice.. hehe) And I said "Of course I'll marry you". And then he went on his knees and proposed and put the ring on my finger. On the wrong hand... but my brain was too overwhelemed to process anything so I didn't notice either.

And I melted, felt i couldn't stand so I buried my face into his shoulder...... And melted. And I think he melted a bit too. Hahaha.

The moments mean much more to me then merely this, and after a day, it's still something that I'm unable to put into words adequate enough to describe how I feel. Need more time to process. Brain is melted from all the excitement and loveeeeeeee...

Matthew Dass, every moment I spend with you is a precious one, and I thank God everyday for you. I cherish you, and I will adore you for the rest of my life. My darling, I love you.

2009-08-20T14:28:00.002+09:30

Thought for the day...

Sometimes we're so busy thinking that we HAVE to pray that we don't realise that we WANT to pray...

2009-08-11T16:04:00.003+09:30

Love you.

I crave for apple pie

2009-08-11T15:15:00.002+09:30

This post is for DebG who has very clearly stated her desire for a blog update. Hahahahah.

I am blogging at this hour because I am at home feeling rather woozy. I can feel the world spinning and colors meshing together when I stand. Like how it is when the movies show the effects of people eating magic brownies.

Whoever said wedding planning is fun is out of their minds. After practically visiting EVERY SINGLE WEDDING SHOP in Ipoh, and almost (almost only okayyy) bursting into tears, we finally found the right dress. What a relief. Heh. Too bad no pictures la, so not gonna show what its like till THE DAY lo...

Then... at work... my goodness...so many weird people come and look for jobs. And because my boss doesn't wanna waste his time talking to them coz they probably won't show up for work the next day, he very graciously sends the new girl to talk to these people, some of which who smell like they haven't showered for 10 days.

There was the rather cookoo lady who came back three times after we sent her away.

There was the Bangladeshi who couldn't stop asking bout the pay after being told 27 times.

There was the boy whose aunty filled in the job application form and answered every question I asked the boy.

There was the lady who just sat there and complained that her other boss was 'tidak adil'.

Then there are those who look like druggies and can't stop shaking.

And then there was this guy who was sniffing and wiping his nose with his hands every 15 seconds which was okay, except that he was using my pen, and at the end of the interview he took my hand and shook it. EErgh... Went back to the office and gave my hands a really good wash with lots of soap. Should have soaked my pen in detol as well. Hmmm.

Still, in the midst of it all, when waiting for one of the particulary smelly guys to fill his application form, I wondered how Jesus loved all these people when He was here on earth. How He didn't send anyone away, but embraced each person with love and compassion.

And the quiet answer was this... They're not any different from you. The way they smell, the way they speak, their lack of education doesn't make them different. You were once like them. Yes, you may have been born into a better family, you may not have lacked food or clothing. But that doesn't make you different. You were once just like them. A sinner. The only thing that sets you apart from them now is you have Me. You have found grace and mercy. You have Me living in you, and because of this, you are set free. So how can you not love them, knowing that I loved you when you were as they are?

First major lesson at the workplace.

Loving God means loving people.

Poised

2009-06-29T10:48:00.003+09:30

Poised for greatness,
Knowing that God is in control.
I stand amazed that He's craved out the detail even in the littlest things of my life.

:D

2009-06-23T00:48:00.001+09:30

Man... God is Good

*Dances around room like mad woman*

Nutters

2009-06-21T17:31:00.002+09:30

This is what I have become....

I have gone nuts.

Rawr!

2009-06-17T06:43:00.002+09:30

This is day no. 3 of sleeping real late and waking up before the sun is up for no apparent reason. How la...

Anyway, since I'm up and wide awake, RAWRRRRRRR! hahah.

Wake up all you sleepy heads.

2009-06-16T23:28:00.001+09:30

OH MAN.....
HEH.

The Anthem

2009-06-14T01:41:00.002+09:30

I heard a song I haven't heard for a long time today. And it stopped me dead in my tracks. For some reason hearing the song jolted me a little.

The song was Negaraku. The national anthem of Malaysia.

It's an anthem that brings back memories of primary and secondary school, where we would have to be in our lines standing still, singing the national anthem. It's a song that makes me think of my country. It's a song that speaks volumes about how my country was, and is now.

And I realise, despite what is happening in Malaysia, it is still my country. No matter what goes on in the political scene, Malaysia will always be my home. And no matter how *ahem* stupid *cough* the government may be, Malaysia, and Ipoh, particularly, will always be dear to me.

Having said that, it's sad to see how amazingly insane things have been with Malaysian politics and well... everything else that goes on here. And I find it so incredibly dumb that we're fighting and bickering over such silly things. Have we forgotten how we gained independence? How blood was shed so that all races could live together?

Negaraku, tanah tumpahnya darahku.

Perhaps it's time we remembered how this country was formed, how independence was gained. Perhaps it's time to be thankful of how lucky we are, even though some things may be unfair.

Rakyat hidup, bersatu and maju.

Perhaps it's time we stood to make a change instead of just complaining about how bad things are.
Perhaps it's time to consider the difference each one of us can make instead of jumping ship to another continent.

Malaysia. My country.
Malaysia. Negaraku.

Release...

2009-06-08T00:41:00.000+09:30

Hahaha. So emo hor. Not to worry... now it's release..... :D

The Brink

2009-06-06T12:31:00.002+09:30

It is when you're standing still at the brink when you see God making possible the impossibility that you face.

Holding on with the very tip of my fingers

2009-06-04T20:12:00.004+09:30

This blog has failed to be the therapeutic release that it was when i first started. Perhaps due the readership of the blog, or perhaps it's because I don't have the time nor energy to type up long and interesting stuff. Still writing offers one of the best ways of release that doesn't involve buckets of tears or finishing up a friends' gas tank.

It's been a tough week since coming back from Cambodia (hence the lack of pictures of the trip). It amazing how a sudden turn of events can turn my insides upside down. It's unfair that it's happening. I didn't wait this long for this to happen. No Way Jose. Then again, life happens right?

Sometimes we can keep so many things inside us that when we want to speak bout it we don't even know where to start anymore. It festers and grows and eats us up but because there's just no one to talk to it remains where it is. And we just learn how to live with it.

We get so used to it that when we try to open up we can't.

Because just whispering it out to the winds might change everything we've ever known. Because saying it out loud means that we're not as strong as we think we are.

Because letting it out means admitting that we're a broken people. Because it will mean that we'll have to deal with it.

Still, in the midst of it all, letting it out means dealing with it. And dealing with it means breaking free and moving on. Moving on to the plans that God has for our lives. Moving on the greater calling of God.

And that's what I'm going to do. Move on to what He has called me to do.

I surrender all.

Broken hearts
Broken dreams
Unfulfilled desires
Shredded hopes
Nothing else to do but surrender
Because I know that you care
You laid down your life, mine, it's yours
Tell me what to do
I'll wait for you to speak to me
I'll wait

Whoaaa

2009-05-31T23:34:00.002+09:30

I now understand how Princess Mia felt in Princess Diaries Two. To lay down her rights, so that she could do what was right for her country.

I wonder if I'm willing to sacrifice my life for the kingdom of God. We always say we do, but when the time comes, the within struggles.

Still, eyes upwards, on my Savior. Focus. Focus.

Hahahaha. So cryptic. This one blog only..... try getting your hands on my journal. It'll be a million times juicier.

Cambodia pictures on facebook

Back

2009-05-29T00:27:00.002+09:30

We are back, safe and sound.

Cambodia was an eye opener.

Thank you all for your prayers. The trip wouldn't have been the way it was without your support.

Pictures and longer post later aite, have to get all the swirling thoughts down on paper first.

Documentary on Cambodia and the mission trip out soon...

2009-05-19T11:53:00.003+09:30

Someone decided that he's going as well....

.....and when I tell him no... he flops down and makes himself even more comfortable

Maybe i'll smuggle him there...

Here we go

2009-05-18T12:56:00.002+09:30

EVERY ONE SAY AHHHHHHHHH COZ WE'RE GOING TO CAMBODIAAAAAAA.

We'll be back in a week with lots of stories to tell.

I"m going to eat all the spiders I can find. Then maybe my childhood dream of becoming spidergirl will come true.

^_^

Vulcans

2009-05-15T01:09:00.002+09:30

Oh to be Vulcan, to be ruled by logic, to be in the place where emotions do not play.

Yet emotions matter, for we were made to know joy, wired to love and to be loved.

Sorrow, sadness. Emotions paired with assumptions, emotions caused by assumptions.

Emotions, not with assumptions, but entwined with truth.

Hmmm....

Red means stop

2009-05-12T18:00:00.002+09:30

Found this among some pictures.

The traffic light was in the middle of nowhere. Like someone purposely put it there just to see if anyone would actually stop. There were no cars coming the other way and yet this car was super law abiding and waited till the light turned green. If this were Malaysia, no one will stop lar... But the lights were there for a reason - they were doing roadworks the other side and only one lane was available further up.

Reminds me how sometimes we don't listen to our heavenly Father when He tells us to stop or slow down because of something ahead. Because we think we know better. Reckon we'd just better stop and do it otherwise we just might have a head on collision with on coming traffic.

Mother's Day

2009-05-10T22:34:00.002+09:30

Hahah what lar...

Mother's day and we sang this little song during service and I totally forgot all the lyrics. Hahahahah. *shy* so just move my mouth and pretended to sing, but then i didn't know the words to lip-sync to. So it was quite bad. Hahaha never mind.

Then they had the kids from Kids Church to give presents to the mummies who were standing, and I was so sitting down when this kid came to me and thrust the present into my hands. Man... I'd better start preparing to be a mummy.

Then I had to go cover this prize giving ceremony which I thought was going to be absolutely boring (which it was) expect for the part where they honored the most examplary mom. Didn't get her name but when they read out her achivements, it was Wowww... Widowed in her early 30s with five kids, she raised them all on her own, earning RM 200 per month as a rubber tapper. The hardship she went through and the courage she had was amazing.

I love my mom. *kiss kiss*

gahhh

2009-05-09T23:52:00.000+09:30

Yorrr.......

It's a balck black day

2009-05-07T17:48:00.003+09:30

Heh. What's this la. After one whole day in the state assembly nothing has been resolved. Like Hindi movie only la... Or Kindergarten

In the assembly...
Siv: I'm in my chair and I'm not moving.
Gan: It's myyyy chair!
Siv: It's mineee
Gan: No it's not.
Siv: Yes it is
Gan: Gimme gimme gimme. Grrrrr

In kindy...
Kid 1: It's my toy and I'm not sharing with you.
Kid 2: It's myyy toy.
Kid 1: No it's not.
Kid 2: Yes it is.
Kid 1: I tell my daddy then you know.
Kid 2: My daddy can beat your daddy up.
Kid 1: Myyy daddy is bigger than your daddy.
Kid 2: It's my toy.. Gimme gimme gimme.

Heh. A black black day.... Tomorrow wear black underwear also la. And maybe I'll paint Samson black as well.

Hohoho

2009-05-07T12:20:00.000+09:30

Perak State Assembly
Round 1
'Ding-Ding'
Fight.

Coming Soon

2009-04-30T11:15:00.004+09:30

Coming soon....Paradise 2

hahaha. Vilsern looks like some Malay boy and Jenson's hands are too long.

2009-04-29T17:06:00.002+09:30

Dear Mr. Bear Nappers,

With reference to your video posted on http://tiffanyoon.blogspot.com/, I wish to inform you that we (BehBeh and I) are saddened by this unexpected turn of events. While our hearts ache for the return of our dear friend, we have never, and WILL NEVER GIVE IN TO TERRORISTS!

We know that bear nappers are generally made up of people who are lonely and in need of some tender loving care (hence the reason they bearnapp teddies). Your request for ransom in the form of extra chocolate chip cookies show that you are so desperate for love and company that you try to fill the gaping hole in your heart with food. Pay heed to us as we tell you that this will never work.

Your request for ransom in the form of extra chocolate chip cookies is thus, might I say, rather ridiculous, though understandble. We suggest you seek conselling from a professional psychotherapist to discover the traumas in your life that made you into a bearnapper.

It is in our hearts to forgive you of the terrible act that you have committed. We understand the loneliness in your life and are aware that you only became part of the despicable beanapping ring because of this. Hence, we we urge you to return YiFah and go seek some professional help.

In the meantime, please make sure that YiFah get a bedtime kiss before he goes to bed. Oh and he usually feels cold in the middle of the night, so cover him with a quilt.

Thanks!

BearNapped

2009-04-28T18:15:00.001+09:30

YiFah & BehBeh chillin' out

YiFah has been bear-napped twice in the last week. Not very sure where he is right now. Waiting for the bear-nappers to send me a ransom note. Me thinks the bearnappers are not very smart...

On behalf of YiFah's twin, BehBeh, (who's very very sad and lonely), I'm appealing to the bear-nappers to please return YiFah with his arms and legs intact. Also, Mr. Bear Napper who lives on the street behind my street, if you don't return YiFah to his rightful owner, I am gonna tell your nosy neighbour some of your juicy secrets... Muahahahaha... :)

Funeral for the fat feathered friend?

2009-04-27T11:03:00.004+09:30

Apparently Gohstan is dead.

Gohstan

But we're not very sure whether this wing flapping, jump at you when you're hanging laundry in the backyard bird has gone to duckie paradise or not. Coz someone doesn't wanna go out and check if he can still move.

How now? The fat feathered friend. He was the King of the Ashok Macho Backyard.

Standing Firm

2009-04-22T12:05:00.004+09:30

So the Miss USA/Miss Universe pageant's winner is North Carolina's Kristin Dalton. Apparently California's Carrie Prejean lost the crown because she stayed true to her beliefs.

Miss California Carrie Prejean is disappointed she didn't win the Miss USA pageant after her answer to question on gay marriage from blogger Perez Hilton sparked controversy, but says she's proud she stayed true to her beliefs and wouldn't change the response – even though she believes it cost her the crown.

Prejean, who was first runner up, appeared Tuesday morning on NBC's "Today" show and when host Matt Lauer asked if she'd alter her answer if given a "do-over," she said no.

"I did not want to offend anybody, but I think with that question specifically, it's not about being politically correct, for me it was being biblically correct," she told Lauer.

During Sunday night's competition, Hilton asked Prejean if she felt all states should move toward allowing same-sex marriage - to mirror the efforts of states like Vermont and California.

She said, "I think it's great that Americans are able to choose one or the other ... same sex marriage or opposite marriage," then added, "I believe that marriage should be between a man and a woman ... that's how I was raised."

Hilton later ranted about Prejean on his celebrity blog and called her some nasty names.

Hilton went on CNN's Larry King Live Monday night while Prejean spoke about the incident the same night to Fox News - fielding questions on whether she thought her answer cost her the crown.

"Out of all the topics I studied up on, I dreaded that one. I prayed I would not be asked about gay marriage. If I had any other question, I know I would have won," she said in the Fox News interview.

Hilton told King he hadn't bashed Prejean for her beliefs, but felt a candidate for Miss USA should offer more inclusive answers.

Hilton has extended Prejean an invitation to discuss the matter over coffee, but she has not accepted.

Prejean appeared at peace with the outcome Monday in her chat with Lauer - again referencing her faith and saying she was proud of herself for advancing so far in the competition.

And as for her close brush with taking the crown?

"It wasn't what God wanted for my life that night," she told Lauer.

I guess it's pretty easy to compromise. Sometimes it's just so much easier to give in to someone or something than to stand for what is right. Especially when nobody agrees with you and you get slammed for 'not being open-minded' or being 'old-fashioned'.

So what Carrie Prejean did, That's just pure standing firm in what she knows is right, despite having to risk (and lose) the coveted Miss Universe title. I love her for it!

Font conference

2009-04-20T22:52:00.004+09:30

So a number of us went to one of our church's Bahasa Indonesia service in Pengkalan yesterday. Since I haven't actually had an actual conversation in BM since high school, I'm pretty rusty when it comes to conversing and understanding what people are saying when they speak BM. It's like there's this need for me to translate what they are saying into English before anything registers in my beautiful head.

Still, it was really really refreshing just to be there. Praising and worshipping God in a different language brought a whole new meaning to the words being sung. Everything was just new and refreshing. Suffice to say, it was something that I really needed.

Then... there was this really funny article on the comic sans font. Apparently, there's this campaign to kill the Comic Sans Font. Hahahahahaha. Go here http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123992364819927171.html for more. The font's been used on pretty much on everything, from Disney ads, gravestones and bowel cancer posters.

Anyway, the article reminded me of this clip i watched eons ago. If the computer fonts we used had real personalities, this would be pretty much what would happen....

The champ

2009-04-14T13:52:00.002+09:30

Sammy the champion

Doggie Tales

2009-04-12T23:48:00.004+09:30

I have a feeling that the dog living in my house is not actually really a dog. In fact, he's so not a dog that he's taken to sleeping on the bed, his head on the pillow, his body under the blanket with only his tiny face peeking out. A few days ago I woke up and saw his face directly next to mine, his eyes closed, and he was snoring. A couple of days after that he was under my blankie all cuddled up.

Sleeping habits aside, the not very doggish dog eats his meals only if it's had fed to him. At times he scampers to the safety of the space underneath the couch when he hears the microwave's 'ting'. And thus has to be cajoled out with one of his yummy snack sticks. Not that I've tasted the sticks, but Sam seems to love 'em. He loves them so much that a number of times he's been caught hiding them so that that we humans would think that he'd finished eating 'em and give him more. Needless to say the humans were being quite regularly duped till we got wise to his tricks.

Then there's the walkies that he goes for around the neighborhood. He's smart enough to place his paws at the precise place and wriggle his bum to escape from his leash. Then there's the time when he decided to poop right in the middle of the road. He only got to do half his poop though coz a car came and we wouldn't wanna let the whole neighborhood know that we allow our pet to plant his little bombs right in the middle of the road where car tyres will definately pass. And just a few days ago Samson, who left for walkies with his human brother came home not on his feet but in the human brother's arms. Because he decided that he didn't want to walk, because he parked himself under the shady tree, and because he just didn't want to move. So he was carried home. Talk about spoilt dogs. Then again, he may just not be a dog...

Oh, and did I mention that not only does he have his friendster profile but also has a fan club on facebook? Much like his owners, he's definately a popular thing. Though we wouldn't really refer to his owners as 'things'.

Samson's not a dog. Quite human, but unfortunately (or fortunately?) hasn't been able to speak, go potty at the toilet bowl, and chocolate harms his little heart.... so not human. Maybe he's an aliennnnn. Hohohoho.

Oh and he's living up to his name - Samson Oon Fui Keow (Fui Keow = fat dog). In English it'd be Samson Oon Fat Dog.

So watcha think? The poll's by the side. Have a go...

Something out of the Ordinary - A blog post

2009-04-09T17:05:00.003+09:30

I know of people who have taken longer breaks from their blogs but I suppose four months of not writing is quite enough for me. Well.. not writing to make money that is... Heheh. Yeap, I actually get paid to write now, but not nonsense la...Can't write much nonsense in a community newspaper that aims to report all the happenings in this small little sleepy town.

Anyhow... was just pondering on the title of this blog. Holding on to His promises. So many things have happened since I changed the title of this blog from 'My Not-So-Soapy Soap Opera' to 'Holding on to His Promises'. I reckon I'm still holding on to what the word of God promises, and that hope in not just believing but knowing that His promises will hold true brings the desire to live, to see what has not yet happen come to pass.

It is quite well, amusing to see how God tells us throughout His word that He WILL keep His promises. Like in Hebrews 10:23 it says that 'He who promises is faithful'. I suppose He knows that it'll be difficult at times, especially during moments when we hang on by our fingertips. At this point I'm thinking of the advantage of strong strong fingers. But yes, God actually promises to keep His promise. And I'm thankful for that :)

God is not a man, that He should lie,
nor a son of man, that He should change His mind.
Does He speak and then not act?
Does He promise and not fulfill?
Numbers 23:19

~Holding on to His promises always~

Yo Yo Yooo

2009-01-10T15:02:00.003+10:30

For what I've been doing lately,
From December to January,
Go see the blogs of Infuse and Tiffany,
There sure got the most unflattering pictures of me.

www.infuse7.blogspot.com

The revival of this blog will occur soon (hopefully la)

Oh yes. In the meantime...

Thesis

2008-10-13T11:07:00.004+10:30

Oh why Oh why did I think that doing a thesis would be cool? Hahahah so bodoh. Have to write so many things. And since I'm super duper last minute when it comes to uni assignments.... well, we all know what happens then -> Drink coffee! No need to sleep! Just do do do. Hahaha doodoo. Do until wanna die!

And so teruk! All my hypothesis not supported! The main one not supported how to do the rest! No relationship between the main variables d test what summore???? Hahahah but i tested it anyway coz the results section would look super empty if i didn't. Hmmm.. maybe next time lazy people who wanna do research can choose a hypothesis that they know will absolutely not be supported so that they don't have to run more than one analysis.

Anyway, now I dunno what to discuss. Cracking my head. Like egg. Haiyo. Then then then I had to reenter all my data coz the file didn't save, eventhough I am VERY sure that I clicked save. So now I'm triple saving everything that I write. One on the desktop, one in my documents and another one in my thumb drive. So paranoid right. hahahahaha Well, that's what happens when you think writing a thesis would be cool.

Oh ya.. then ah, we need to put a 'statement of authorship' before everything else, saying we wrote everything ourselves and didn't plagarize stuff, and it's the same statement for everyone la. So since my friend already typed it out, can just copy and paste, just change the name (since its the same for the whole class anyway...). But then! this silly girl who is now blogging did something super silly! I sent the thesis to my supervisor without changing my friend's name to my name. hahahahah. so i plagarized the statement of authorship. Cut and paste summore.

Number of words to go: 1500. Just the discussion left. Thank heavens.

I miss....

2008-10-10T09:54:00.002+10:30

Samson the alien

UpDaTeZzzzzz

2008-09-20T12:05:00.010+09:30

Hoo-RAY!!! She's alive! Comm'on lets give her a Hip Hip Hooray and do a Mexican Wave! Yaaahoooooo!

Well. It's been roughly bout two months since I came back to Adelaide and that's like so so so fast. Seems like only a week ago that I was back home in Ipoh. Still, I kinda feel so far removed from all the people and things that I love. Not to worry though, I'm still having quite some fun (admist all the readings and assignments, not to mention the 4000 word literature review and thesis that's due on Oct 17! O_O!!!!!)

I've gotten more acquainted not only with the human residence of this household, but also the non-human ones:

Gohstan & Ligster and the two humans, one of which is trying to see if she can fly...

The fishies; Emperor Laka, King Xerxes and Keong Chong. Unfortunately, both the rulers of this little water kingdom passed on to Fish Paradise, leaving behind the very fat and healthy citizen to rule over the plastic plants. We were very sad on the day that we put our dear friends to rest. Laka and Xerxes, we still feel the raw hole you left in our hearts everytime we see this memorial site in our backyard...

Not to worry though! A friend bought two new fishies and now Lucky, Luku and Keong Chong just keep swimming, swimming, swimming (although it's just round and round the bowl...), making the water kingdom complete again.

Then there was the Merdeka party, and we wore 'I *heart* Malaysia' t-shirts and sarongs. We looked like Ah-Mas la...

Two Ah-Mas and a Colgate advertisements at a bus stop

Hmmm... can't remember what else I've done. Oh yea. Cooked. A lot. Meals for one, two, three, four, twenty, thirty.... Baked cakes, bread, puffs, stuff. Cleaned and tidied the house 1047574365 times because we mess it up the day after we clean it. Yes, done alot but also done nothing. Hohoho.

Oh.. and this household has managed to lose loads of stuff:

1. TV remote control, so we watched only Channel 7 for two weeks, coz we were too lazy to get up and switch channels. For awhile we actually thought that someone must have mistaken the remote for a pencil box and accidentally taken it home. A friend was actually asked to buy a not real punya remote from pasar malam and bring it back here. hahahaha. This very important eletronic divice was finally found in the room of one of the housemates, under a pile of paper she was trying to flatten.

2. Car keys. For a few days. Owner of the car keys was looking high and low for it and the keys were finally found by a dear visitor. It was hanging on the side door. It HAD BEEN HANGING on the side door. FOR AT LEAST FOUR DAYS!. Oh.. did I mention that the car keys were hooked on the same key chain as ALL the house keys?

3. Peacock Feather Earring, still missing.

4. Yellow Wheelie Bin. Went missing when it was wheeled out to be emptied. Somehow though, now we have two yellow wheelie bins.

Anyhow.... i'll continue bout whats been going on next time la....

Steadfast

2008-06-24T15:12:00.002+09:30

Psalm 51v10,11

Create in me a clean heart, O God,

and renew a steadfast spirit within me

Do not cast me from your presence

or take your Holy Spirit from me

I looked up the word STEADFAST in the dictionary (online dicky la of course!), and this was what came up:

Steadfast: 1) immovable (firmly fixed in place)
2) loyal (a firm belief, determination, adherence)

It draws a picture of stability. A spirit that is not easily swayed. A renewed determination, a spirit that will stand firm in what it believes in.

Firm. Determined. Loyal. Devoted. Immovable.

Yes, when everything is swaying, all I want is a steadfast spirit. A steadfast spirit, renewed, in loving Him and living in His will.

Facebooked

2008-06-11T16:59:00.003+09:30

I've caved!

I've joined Facebook!

Oh nooooo!

Poke me.

Write on my wall.

And erm. whatever else people do on facebook.

haha. Facebooking now.

I will not get addicted to Facebook.

I will not get addicted to Facebook. I will not get addicted to Facebook.

Poke Poke Poke

Sabotaged!

2008-06-05T11:15:00.004+09:30

Sabotaged! She posted the post below without my permission! No manners! Must steal her bolster and hide it! Better keep your aneroxic bolster in your safe and lock it up la Tiffany Oon...

Emo personified.

Paradise

2008-05-30T11:38:00.003+09:30

June 6th. FGA Ipoh. 6.30 pm

I wonder....

2008-05-28T12:03:00.004+09:30

I wonder what my boss will say if I told him that I can't finish my work coz my dog ate my laptop?

Haha. Which makes me wonder, if my dog ate up my laptop, what will his poo look like? Will it be square like the laptop? Or will his poo be silver, like my laptop's color. Hmmm.

dentist dentist dentist!

2008-05-26T23:56:00.002+09:30

So I finally went to THE DENTIST! after one week of agonizing over whether to go or not. Hah. In the end I went coz mom MADE me go. I had ABSOLUTELY NO CHOICE. She said "Go dentist! Otherwise I'll pull your tooth out for you myself! I use plyar wan ar!!!!" So i went... But please note that I'd rather live with the agony of my upper wisdom tooth grinding on my lower gums than go visit THE DENTIST! if it were my choice.

Yeah, I had to remove my third wisdom tooth. Last two I took out last year. Or the year before last. Anyway, I went into THE DENTIST!'s room expecting my usual dentist to be the one taking my tooth out. But to my horror, it was a different dentist! WAHHHH! And she was like, hmmm. I don't think I can fit the thing in to take the tooth out. Hmm.. wait ar, let me see what to do.

Wahhhhh! I panic gilar! HOW HOW HOW! My eyes also filled with tears already la! hahahahah. So I requested (very politely of course) for my usual dentist. Thank goodness He was just outside doing some paperwork or something. Then he came in. And the following conversation took place...

THE DENTIST! : Ooohh. It's you ar?
Me: Heheh. Ya.
THE DENTIST! : Let's see what's the problem here. Open mouth.
Me: Arhhhh (sound of opening mouth)
THE DENTIST! : Ahh.. simple only. Let's take it out.
Me in my heart: Phew!
Dentist takes out evil looking apparatus, fits it into my mouth, and starts to pull.
Me: AARRHHHHH (Sound of pain)
THE DENTIST : (while still pulling) So Mindy, if I die how?
Me: Aarrhhhhhhhhhhuh?!
THE DENTIST : What will you do if I die? Then you no more dentist you know.
Me: Oh. Uh. Erm. Don't go dentist anymore lo.
THE DENTIST : *Sigh* I'll try not to die yet.
Me: !?

Hahahahahahahahahaha.

Entry from a sinner's diary

2008-05-21T21:47:00.003+09:30

A little something I wrote for the church megazine. Heh. The mag is not out yet, so the copyright still mine right. hahaha. Actually I cannot tahan la, just wanna put it up here. Enjoy!

Entry from a sinner's diary

I’d heard that He was in town. Everyone was talking about it. He’d even been invited to Simon’s for dinner! Simon’s! Imagine that! People from every corner of the earth seemed to be spilling on the town streets, dressed in every color conceivable to mankind – women with outrageous hats, women without hair to wear outrageous hats, men with their double breasted suits, men without slippers, children with parents and children without – all were out to catch a glimpse of Him. Some of them spoke of His arrival with joyous celebration, others with suspicious whispers. As I trudged the streets home after another hard day, I realized for once that no one was staring at me. For once, no one was looking at me with hatred, someone else occupied their thoughts. Grateful, I hurried home.

But He was in town! How could I go home? I really wanted to see Him. Hearing all the stories about Him made me excited. There was something about this person, and it was as if there was a magnet, slowly, but surely, drawing me to Him. I wanted to go to Simon’s, even if I had to face the unforgiving eyes of all who were there. But what would He think of me? After all, someone would have told Him about the worst sinner in town. If they hadn’t told Him about me, they would, surely, the minute they saw me.

I deserved the treatment I got from them. It was justice. After all, I was a bad person and I had done things. Unspeakable things. Things I wish I hadn’t done, because there was nothing I could do to correct them. I was a sinner. I was bad. I knew it, and everyone else knew it.

But still, I wanted to meet Him. Why? Why?! I yelled in my head. It’d be the same. He’d find out bout what I did, who I was, truly, deep down inside. He’d know, he’d know for sure. Still, there was something about this man. Perhaps, if I brought a gift, I thought. Not just any gift, but the most expensive thing that I had. He deserved the most, the best that I could give. I’d go early, and leave early, before the crowds arrived.

So I went, early, with my gift, a large jar of the most expensive perfume, my most prized possession. With every step to Simon’s house I struggled with my thoughts. It wasn’t just stupid to face the whole town to see this man, it was insane! Still, I had to see Him. He was pulling me towards Him, and I realized at that moment that I not only wanted to see Him. For some reason, I needed to.

I arrived at Simon’s house. Already there were more people that Simon’s house could contain. And they stared. What is she doing here? I could here them whisper. He wouldn’t want to see her! Tell her to get lost!

No. No, I whispered to myself. You’ve come this far. Just keep walking. You will get in. You will see Him. You will meet Him.

And there He was. He was just a few feet away, reclining at the table, His back toward me. Every cell in my body told me to run. But there it was again. The unexplainable pull. And as I got nearer, I was overcome with emotion. There was something about this man that I just couldn’t put my finger on.

Then, I was right behind Him, and I couldn’t hold all the emotions in anymore. For the first time after a long, long while, I wept. I wept till his feet was washed with my tears, and I knelt down beside Him. I dried His feet with my hair, and anointed them with the perfume that I had brought.

In the midst of all I was doing, I was suddenly aware of His hand on my shoulder. My heart stopped. I was afraid. How could I, a sinner, come up to this man, and do what I just did? It was unthinkable! I didn’t have to look at the faces of the people round me to know what they were thinking. Oh… what did I just do?

Then the most unexpected happened. He lifted my face to look into His. And as He looked right into me with the most caring pair of eyes, He said the most loving, most wonderful thing that I could ever have hoped to hear. He said to me “My daughter, I forgive you. Go home in peace, for your faith has saved you”.

In that instant, I knew exactly what was so different about this man. I knew, without a doubt in my heart, what drew me towards Him. He offered me something that I didn’t deserve, and he offered it without condition.

He offered me grace.

An adaptation of Luke 7 v 36-50

So. Not. Emo. hahahah

2008-05-17T11:47:00.004+09:30

Wah. lately the posts in this blog getting more and more emo la. Haha. No la, I'm not an emo person ok...Although ESTHER GOH says that the room in Adelaide that's waiting for me is most suitable for me coz its got black carpeting. So Black = Emo la.... But to me, Black = no need to vacuum! Coz cannot see the dirt! Muahahahaha (evil laugther sound track).

So, since like so many emo posts already, I shall try and make this a not so emo post. Haha. Hmm let's see if I have any thing funny to report. Oh yea... I have a new best friend! His name is Micheal Yoong aka Burger Boy. I think he's annouced to the whole world that I'm his best friend. Hahaha. Cute. I shall go eat burgers for him today. Not with him, mind you, for him. Hehe *grinz*

Ohhhh. And I got two more new friends. BUBBLES and BUM BUM! I MUST GO GET THEIR PICTURES. Arrgghhh! It's just so not possible that they're so incredibally adorable. They're puppies lar. Boy and girl. Girl is Bubbles. Coz she's fun. Boy is Bum Bum. Coz he's lazy. Haha. I love bubbles, I love bum bum (the dog, not the backside). Bubbles and bum bum. Bubbles and bum bum. Bum Bum and bubbles.

Samson escape artist la! Everyday watching for chance to escape from the front door. Hahah today he escaped and went running like mad dog on the road. With the tongue hanging out from the side of his mouth. Gilar. haha Then must catch him.

Hahaha. PARADISE (the movie that is) IS COMPLETED. Come and watch the whole thing on the 6th of June!

Boy, I really need to put pictures up. But malas la. Have to go cari the pictures then wait for it to load... so longgggggg. Well. see how la. lol. Always promise pictures, but never post pictures. haha. Wait la, must go and curi pictures from people first.

Hmm.. nothing much seems to be happening now. Oh ya. except that I went for the dance practice. Not to dancela doink, to see how the dance preparations were coming along for the infuse anniversary. Haiyo. hahaha. the guys ar....They dancing like toufu la! TOUFU! got one worst than toufu. tou fu fah. and another one. chow tou fu. But the girl dancers were ok. They were not toufu. If they dance like that on that day ar, I will bring toufu to throw at them. Lem pek pek punya toufu. muahahaha

OK la. I shall be back posting later. This post is to show you that I'm not emo only. Hahah and that i'm alive.

I'm a pirate. Yohoho and a bottle of rum. Bring me one noggin of rum, now, won't ya, matey. Or I'll be making yer walk the plank to davy jones' locker... Savvy?

When You seem so far away

2008-05-08T00:31:00.003+09:30

What does one do when God seems so far away that tears not only don't matter anymore, they just don't come?

I struggled the past two months. I struggled with work, I struggled with some things happening around me, I struggled to understand others, I struggled to allow others to understand me. I battled with myself. I struggled with faith, I struggled with God. I wanted to crash my car, drive it into the lampost and over the flyover. It took all my will power not to burst into tears during dinner. My energy was sapped, I was exhausted - physically, mentally, emotionally.

Things got a little better, but I'm struggling again. As I'm typing this, I feel numb. Blank. If my emotions were hooked up to a heart monitor you'll probably hear the long unending Tooooottttttt of the monitor when it can't sense the heart beating anymore. Hah. So drama.

But yes, I struggled, and I'm still struggling. I call and call, prayer upon prayer whispered in the middle of the night and all I get is silence. I remember the first line to the song Totally You - "I'm overwhelmed when silence speaks".

I'm overwhelmed. Numb. Blank. I don't know what to do. I ask You why You seem so far away. I ask myself why You seem so far away. And silence speaks. Numb. Blank.

Why do You seem so far away? Why? I know You love me. I know You'll never leave me, never forsake me. So how come the silence? Why aren't You saying anything?

Then today I found this song. And I couldn't help the tears when I heard it

Steven Curtis Chapman
Sometimes He Comes In The Clouds

These are the places I was so sure I'd find Him
I've looked in the pages
And I've looked down on my knees
I've lifted my eyes in expectation
To see the sun still refusing to shine, but...

[Chorus:]Sometimes He comes in the clouds
Sometimes His face cannot be found
Sometimes the sky is dark and greyBut some things can only be known
And sometimes our faith can only growIf we can't see
So sometimes He comes in the clouds

Sometimes I see me, a sailor out on the ocean
So brave and so sure as long as the skies are clear
But when the clouds start to gather I watch my faith turn to fear, but...

Sometimes He comes in the clouds
Sometimes His face cannot be found
Sometimes the sky is dark and greyBut some things can only be known
And sometimes our faith can only grow If we can't see

Sometimes He comes in the rain
And we question the pain
And wonder why God can seem so far away
But time will show us
He was right there with us, and...
Sometimes He comes in the clouds
Sometimes His face cannot be found
Sometimes the sky is dark and grey
But some things can only be known
And sometimes our faith can only growWhen we can't see
So sometimes He comes in the clouds

And then I read this verse - In Him we live, and move, and have our being. And I know that He's with me every step of the way. Even when all I hear is silence, He is with me.

I'm still struggling. But now, I know I'll be ok. His love is steadfast. Things will be better tomorrow.

PARADISE

2008-05-06T23:59:00.003+09:30

In conjunction with Infuse's first year anniversary, a video is being filmed to celebrate this momentous event. Have a look at the teaser to 'Paradise'........

Awesome.. wanna see more ah? Come for the premier la. Infuse anniversary on the 6th of June. hehehehehhe. .

Tahgueed.

2008-04-27T23:29:00.003+09:30

Tagged. By Grecia. Only for you okay. So you better bring back chocolates for me when you come back. Or else! hhrumph.

8 random facts about myself.

1. I have gone without bathing for three whole days. Hahahahaha. I suppose this isn't the best fact to put as No. 1. But it's true. It was too cold ok. So I didn't bathe la. Spray perfume. Hahaha. Au Naturel mer...You people in aussie didn't know that right. Coz I still smell nice and look really clean even when I don't bathe.

2. I like doing things alone. Like shopping. And going to the beach to look at the waves. Going to places where there are spectacular views. I like being alone with my thoughts. I suppose sometimes this little trait of mine makes people think I'm emo. But I'm not la. I promise I won't bite your head off if you interrupt me. Hahahahahha.

3. Driving is one of the best ways to de-stress. I love going for drives, especailly when the roads are clear KL highways. I use to do this all the time when I stayed there. And I miss it. Somehow I just think better when I drive. Driving allows me to arrange my thoughts and think through things. So I do this alot when I'm down in the dumps and when my emotions are getting the better out of me. But petrol very expensive la, so must learn how to cycle and think at the same time instead...

4. I am unable to leave a book unfinshed. It's just wrongggggg.... lol. if i start reading a book, I have to finish it. No matter how boring. Mind you, I'm talking bout novels and other books that I choose to read on my own free will lar. Not text books of course. That I can leave unfinished, thank you very much. In all my life, I've not finished only two books, one of which was J.R.R. Tolkien's The Simarillion. So cacat. I tell you, by the time I read the third page, I couldn't remember what happen on the first page. I'm sure it must have been a good story though... I promise I'll watch the movie if they ever decide to put the book on big screen

5. I am a rice bin. I need rice to survive. I feel weird if I don't have rice at least twice a week. It's my staple lar. I'll choose rice over noodles anytime. Rice is good. like chinaman only la.

6. I am really good at abstract art. Because I can't draw. At all. In primary school I got like this super big red 'D' on my art project. Hahaha. But since I thought I put like super a lot of effort into the project, I took my own marker pen and changed the 'D' into and 'A'. Hahahha.

7. I am deathly afraid of cocroaches. (spelling correct?). If i see one in the bathroom you can be sure that I won't use the bathroom. If I'm bathing halfway and I see one, I will really run out of the bathroom. I cannot garuntee if I will have any clothes on at that moment. Hopefully I'll be at least wrapped in a towel lar. When I get to heaven the first thing I will ask is why God made cocroaches.

8. I love rain. I like the pitter patter of rain at night. I like playing in the rain. I use to collect rain water to measure the rainfall. The only time I don't like rain is when I'm driving. And when it rains when I really shouldn't be getting myself wet. heh.

So there you go.. 8 random facts. In exchange for chocolates.

Some stuff lah.

2008-04-24T13:18:00.003+09:30

Ok ok. So many things going on. So many things to say. So little time to type what I wanna say. Hahah. Sounds like I'm so busy like that right. Lol. I haven't updated for quite some time already. Been meaning to, but everytime I want to write something, I seem not to have the time. And everytime I have the time, I seem not to want to wirte. Heh. Go figure.

So. First Off.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOEL OON MIN JHEN

Hope your 15th is a good one. Praying with all my heart that you'll grow up to be a man after God's heart. Lord knows, the world is very much short of those these days =)

No. 2.

JEZ! I'M EXCITED TOO! CAN"T WAIT TO SEE YOU ALL IN ADELAIDE! Although it's with a heavy heart that I leave Ipoh and all the people here, even if it's only for four months. But this time round, I don't feel the dismay and heavy heartedness I felt when I was making the choice to go back to Adelaide as I did at the end of last year.

Third.

I need to buy a duck when I get back to Adelaide. Coz Esther has one. And Suling has one as well. Or maybe I should just learn how to make roast duck. Muahahahhaha.

Fourth.

Planetshakers in KL was not at all bad. Haha. the staying in KL after that was better. I cannot believe how much I ate in one day. It's ridiculous! Wanna know how much.. go to Tiffany's blog... I've also discovered the reason to Marx's continuously growing middle part.... The amount of food he can put away amazes me.

No. Lima.

I've repainted the room downstairs. So now I really have a place to call my own. MY ROOM. My Sanctuary.

NO 6.

I found myself crying over this puppy in the pet shop. Haiyo. Standing there looking at the puppy with my eyes tearing. Haha. So not me. It's all Samson's fault. Now everytime I see a puppy, my heart just melts. And the puppy doesnt even have to be cute. All it has to do is look at me. Of course, cute puppies get extra points la...

Pictures later. Some of it.. sigh.. I really have no words to describe some of the pictures. Hence they're pictures la. hahahha ok ok. enough nonsense

Till the next post, which might be like five months away, but hopefully not. Oh in the meantime, go check out www.simplyblatant.com =)

Hangin' on

2008-04-07T13:46:00.003+09:30

Just hanging on for dear life.

Plasticine men

2008-03-19T14:41:00.003+10:30

Ahhh...sticky little plasticine men.

Infuse News "300"

2008-03-06T14:08:00.002+10:30

Yes yes, I know I posted already today. But I'm in the office alone and there's nothing to do...

Rainbows

2008-03-06T12:13:00.005+10:30

I woke up with a wonderful dream two days ago. I think I was smiling like an idiot about it for at least half the day. Haha.

I dreamt that I was in the car, driving, fetching someone and we were really late. It was in the morning, but the skies were covered by black clouds. Like literally black clouds and it was getting darker by the second. So dark that I couldn't drive coz I couldnt see where I was going. So we had to get out of the car, and I was feeling totally lost and just so unsettled. Everything seemed to be spinning around, there was no light, just complete darkness.

Then there it was. A little rainbow parting the dark clouds.

And then there was another one, and another one, and another one, rainbows everywhere I turned. Big ones, small ones.

And I smiled. And cried. And just hung on. Because I knew that the clouds would soon be going away.

Yea, it just remimded me that God is faithful and He keeps His promises. And all I have to do right now is to hang on to him. I will wait. Because He makes everything beautiful in His time. Everything.

Swinging according to His tempo,

Smiling because I know I'm safe in His arms.

Excitement

2008-03-02T23:56:00.002+10:30

Something's going to happen.
I can feel it.

Change

2008-02-21T18:07:00.002+10:30

Samson Oon

gonna become

Samo Hung.

Soon.

Fat.

But still sexy.

Not that I think Samo Hung is sexy lah.

Just that Samson Oon's tummy is almost reaching the floor.

Almost.

Love

2008-02-11T16:42:00.000+10:30

This is love

Courage

2008-01-31T14:09:00.000+10:30

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I - I took the one less travelled by, and that has made all the difference ---- Robert Frost.

I want to be able to say this at the end of my life. To take the path less travelled, the narrow way. Go the way others may think it's crazy to. The way that even I think it's crazy to go at times.

But someone once told me - 'It's time to stop, think and reevaluate when you're on majority's side'. Yes, I think it's true. And it takes courage to do so. Especially when people think you've gone bananas. Courage. Courage and Faith.

Behold the turtle. He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out ----James Bryan Conant.

Perhaps taking risks isn't all that dangerous after all.

Perhaps it's the one thing that would make all the difference in the world.

2008-01-28T15:36:00.000+10:30

I feel very happy. Don't ask me why. Hahahaha. Very high for some reason. Sleep also got stupid grin on my face.

Samson almost became an eunach. Snip! Snip!

I've decided that my next doggie is going to be a Rottwiller. I'm gonna name him Muffin. The Stud Muffin.

I have my sister's teeth marks on my arm. She tried to bite me while we were playing Ultimate Frisbee. So ganas. Like bulldozer.

I have a bruise on my left knee and another one above my right ankle. I have a cut on my right knee. No idea where they all came from.

I scraped my right arm. Slipped in the toilet. Please don't ask me which toilet. Memalu-fying-kan only.

Heh. Dunno why I get bruises so easily man. And they last for weeks and weeks! There was once I got bruises on my upper arms and legs from doing some army soilder crawl on ropes that were like five feet above the ground. I was like the only one who had arms that turned purple almost immediately. Wah! And it took three months for it to go away.

U don't wanna see the bruise on the other arm....

Then there was the time yours truly went to play paintball and got shot point blank in the leg. Twice summore! Those bruises lasted about 8 weeks. Oh... but they were beautiful when they turned the yellowish purple color. Hehe. Ahhh. the I had a horrible one on my left knee that lasted for about 6 weeks. Terjatuh in the toilet. So bodoh.

Toilet bruise

Kena tembak. Never wanna go scrimmage again.

These are the ones that I know where they came from. The rest I have no idea. Simply bumping against the chair or the bed gives me a bruise. There was once I got a bruise from Samson's paw. And it wasn't like he was jumping at me or anything. He was just sitting on me. Heh.

But I love the colors. I love how they turn reddish purple. Then purple. Then greenish purple. Then yellowish green. Call me crazy but I think the colors are beautiful....... hehehehe

Holdin' on

2008-01-14T02:58:00.000+10:30

A new year, a new name. Yeap, I've changed the name of my blog. 'My Not-So-Soapy-Soap Opera' is now officially 'Holding on to His promises'. Mainly because I'm holding on tight to God's promises for me. Ain't ever gonna let go of Him. But also because I totally lived a very VERY Soapy Soap Opera last year, which makes the name so not suitable anymore. Heh.

But lets get back to the sentence before the sentence before this sentence - Ain't ever gonna let go of Him. I suppose in actual fact it's Him who's not letting go of me. And I praise Him that it's this way because I probably wouldn't have been able to hold on for very long. Yeah, if it were me doing the holding we'd most likely be continents apart by now. Heh, galaxies apart, even.

It's a great feeling, you know, being held by Him. And He knows me. He knew, no, He KNOWS me so well that He was able to write my autobiography even before I was born. Autobiographies are, as you know, books wirtten about people (mostly important people) after their lives have been lived and they've done something super important that warrants their days to be imortalized in paper (unless we decide to burn books...)

Psalm 139 v 13-16
For you created my innermost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
I praise you because I am fewrfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
Your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

But Imagine! .....to have Him pen out my autobiography even before I was born. Boy! Even before I did important stuff. Even before I did anything at all!

And there's this to consider. The bestselling author, the guy who has His book in the top selling list every year, without fail, is writing my autobiography.

Awesome leh......

2007

2007-12-31T19:35:00.000+10:30

It's been a great year.

God's been good.

It'll be even better next year.

Coz God IS good.

I'm holdin' on to His promises...

Have a great year ahead.

The Camp

2007-12-27T20:28:00.000+10:30

Finally. I have time to breathe. Here's what I've been up to lately...

INFUSE CAMP '07 SATURATED

Beautiful place....coz it was like Adelaide coolness in the middle of autumn, minus the wind. Purrrfeccctttt.

Nice envelopes for us to put in encouraging notes for each other at the beginning of the camp.

Erm... Nice envelopes at the end of camp. Everyone is a kokoi. Except Joy. She became Joy Chow, then she became Gay Chow.

Sigh...Joy and I look like jakuns.

Miciahhhh. My group mates. President of the Kokoi Club in the first row, on the left.

Pastor super strong. Can throw every guy over his shoulders. And spin them a few times while they're up there.

But no one can carry him. Not even two people. Heh. INFUSE guys scrawny lahhhhh.

Sharon the movie star. Lilian the fan. Tiffay paparazzi. Joy Sharon's assistant who badly wants to be in the picture too.... :P

Fern.... Go to her blog for more camp pictures.

Infuse Chirstmas and Carolling pictures and some mangkuk videos up soon....

It's not about me.

2007-12-05T22:09:00.000+10:30

So... It's been almost a month. Lalalalalalalalalalallalala.

Ok. First of all.... go and check this out --> www.simplyblatant.com. Awesome shirts. Awesome designs. Awesome people designing them shirts. Buy Buy Buy! Where esle can you find shirts with Turkey Santa?! heheh

NO 2. I know it's a bit late telling this coz I got the news bout a month back, but my blood test results are finally normal. "Excellent", according to my doctor.

Third. For those who are in Ipoh on the 21st of Dec, come join us for an amazing INFUSE Christmas Celebration. It's Friday, at 7.30 pm.

Fourth. It's not about me.

Job 42v1,2. Then Job replied to the Lord: "I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted."

It's not about me. It's not about us. It's about God. It's about us answering Him, it's about us saying yes to Him, it's about us being available to Him, it's about us saying Here I am, use me. It's about us being obedient to Him.

And if we're not obedient to His call, well then, He can easily raise someone else to do what He wanted to use us for. No plan of yours can be thwarted. Think you're indispensible? Then think again...

So it's simple really..... It's whether we're willing to put God in the center of our world.

Fifth. I'll be going back to Adelaide in Feb. Wanna visit me, better come soon lahhh..... :)

:) :P :) :P :) :P

2007-11-10T14:19:00.000+10:30

Yes! I finally hit the 5000 mark! That means 5000 visitors! Or to be precise, 5004 visitors! nyek nyek. Now just gonna have to wait for another year before it reaches 10 000. Hmmm... unless I refresh the page every 10 times a day. Hehe. then maybe can reach 10 000 in 6 months instead of a year :)
___________________________

Eh.... Can you people in Adelaide hurry up and get your butts here. Coz I'm missing you guys lar..

I miss Esther Goh. I miss Esther Goh coming to my room and lying on my bed AND FALLING ASLEEP ON MY BED EVENTHOUGH HER ROOM IS JUST NEXT DOOR! I miss knocking on her door and eating up her food.

I miss Jez. I miss Jez's rediculous way of laughing at everything. I miss her funny-ness. I miss my very small size friend.

I miss James. I miss his lameness. I miss his super lamesness. Yes, I miss lames lams very much. I miss his super comfortable chair. Can I rent it next year instead of renting a room? After all, all I need is a place to sleep. Don't really need a table, I do my work on the bed anyway... Place to sleep and a toilet. That's all I need. I rent you chair yea? Please?

I miss Huey Chi. I miss going to her house..... I miss you Huey Chi!

I miss Su Ling! Nobody can talk nonsense like you lahhhhhhhh.

Haiya.. so many people I'm missing. Can't type all the names here. I miss everyone in Adelaide. I even miss Adelaide. heh. Though I love Ipoh. How now? How now? How now?
___________________________

Samson smells today. He hasnt had a bath for more than two weeks now. Stinks man.
___________________________

INFUSE INFUSE INFUSE!
inspire instill saturate empower
INFUSE Camp!
lalalalalalalalala
___________________________

I feel like I need to pangsai now. But I already pangsai in the morning. And it was very stinky.
___________________________

Zephaniah 3v17
The Lord your God is in your misdt,
The Mighty One will save,
He will rejoice over you with gladness,
He will quiet you with His love
He will rejoice over you with singing.

He will quiet me with His love. He will quiet me with his love! HE WILL QUIET ME WITH HIS LOVE!
Amazing.
___________________________

Infuse

2007-11-06T18:12:00.000+10:30

Check this out

www.infuse.weebly.com

Heh

2007-10-31T01:31:00.001+10:30

Oy. What you doing reading my blog.

GO STUDY LAHHHHH.

Hahahahahahahahahahaha

Wait.

2007-10-26T14:04:00.000+09:30

I asked God for a rainbow the other day. Coz it was raining and i was feeling terrible. And I spent the whole day straining my neck in weird angles to look for a rainbow. And no rainbow!

I asked why. Why don't you wanna give me a rainbow? Rainbow only wat! Just seven colors across the sky! Don't even have to be a full rainbow! Like i don't need to see where the rainbow ends lah you know?

And I felt Him say Because I long to give you something better. Something better than a rainbow, something just for you, especially for you. But you must wait.

*God, if I wait long enough can I have a double rainbow? like the ones I use to see in Adelaide? Please? Pleassseeeeee? Pretty Pretty Please?*

You...

2007-10-22T22:48:00.000+09:30

You

You make me want to dance,

You make me want to sing.

You make me want to laugh,

You make me want to smile.

You make me want to stare, to gasp for air,

You make me mad and keep me sane.

You make me want to love,

You make me want to live,

You make me want to be lovely for you, as lovely as I find you.

Yet I cry

Because you don't know how you make me feel

So I pray

That one day you will

And one day

You too will feel

And when you do

It will be real

Doggy updates

2007-10-18T14:41:00.000+09:30

Samson is one pampered dog. A very pampered dog.

People call and say they're dropping by my place. To see my dog.

He's been called darling, he's been called dear and the latest - baby.

"Baby, do you want some milk?"
"Baby, you havent poo poo lah today."
"Baby, why are you under the chair?"
"Aiyo baby, gor gor so bad, never switch on the fan for you ah..."

He's got the most toys in the world. Even my Pooh Bear belongs to him now.

Poor Pooh Bear. Shaken and bitten, tossed and hidden.

Ahhh and he loves socks. Put on a pair of nice clean socks, and you'll have to run for you life.

Nice socks, comfy socks, now poor socks, holey socks.

Still I love him. Oh how I love him.

Coz no other welcomes me the way he does.

WooHooooooooo

2007-10-10T11:26:00.000+09:30

WooHoooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Last dose of steriods today!
No more tomato face!
Lalalalalalalalalalala
*Dances around and shakes backside*

Blown away

2007-10-08T11:11:00.000+09:30

This year I asked for some drama. I got more than I asked for. My life has been more than dramatic this year. I should change the title of this blog to "My Much-Too-Soapy Soap Opera".

It's been a frustrating seven days. I have been emoing.

I was having a chat with someone the other day, asking him the usual questions - what he was doing... blah blah blah. Likewise, he asked me the same question. And I told him the summarised version of it.. sick, hospital, back for a break till next year.. blah blah blah. Anyway, at the end of our little chat, he asked if I've ever watched some DVD on healing by a speaker (I can't remember which speaker). And for some reason, I got angry. Annoyed. Though to the fella I was chatting too, I was the picture of cordality. Heh.

But inside I was boiling. I think it was because I felt like "Hello, it's been 17 years. I think I'm way pass the watching DVDs on healing" stage.

I went home and almost cried myself to sleep. God, it's been 17 years! I have been waiting for 17 years! Is that not long enough?? How much longer do You want me to wait?

Maybe I also felt a little jealous of others who have gotten healed. God, when is it going to be my turn? How come they get healed and I don't? You said faith the size of a mustard seed. Don't I have that? Am I resigned to the fact that I am going to have to cope with this for the rest of my life? Am I THAT disillusioned?? And if I were to be dissapointed, would it mean that I'm not happy with Your will for me?

I'm stretched enough already! I feel like a rubberband that's about to loose its elasticity. God, isn't this enough?

But along with all this, I have so many things to be thankful for. And I can see God working even in this period of time.

Which is so unfair! Because I'm upset with You, God, for not healing me and You're making it hard for me to do that. Ish.

And You make it even harder when You tell me to turn to this passage. Double ish. Ish Ish.

2 Cor 12:7-10

v7 And least I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure.

v8 Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me.

v9 And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Chirst may rest upon me.

v10 Therefore, I TAKE PLEASURE in infirmities, in reproaches, in need, in persecutions, in distress, for Christ's sake For when I am weak, then I am strong.

God, You blow my mind.

Matters of the Heart

2007-09-29T02:07:00.000+09:30

Many have asked if I ever ask why this has happened (this being Ulcerative Colitis and all the other not so nice stuff that has happened this year). The answer is YES.

Of course I've asked why. I've repeated that word in my mind a hundred thousand times. I've questinoedI've questioned God a million times. I've cried and sobbed and gotten angry. And I have to admit that a couple of times I've almost given up. People have come up to me saying they think I'm brave, that they wouldn't have handled everything as well as I have; but I don't think I'm brave. At all. What other choice do I have? I CANNOT NOT cope with it. Because not coping with it would mean giving in, giving up, and ultimately, succumbing to the circumstances.

But why? Why? WHY?

I can ask till I'm blue in the face, but there still might not be an answer. It's frustrating, not knowing the answers. So I've decided it's high time for a little perspective modification. Change the 'WHY' to 'WHAT'. What have I learnt from this? What can I learn? What is it about this that I can share? What has God done throughout all this? What is He doing now?

What? indeed. It's amazing what a little change in perspective can do.

However, the one main question I'm asking now is 'What does God see in my heart?' It's a scary thought! Because He sees everything. The good, the bad and the ugly. Oh-uh..... Time for a slef-check.

Besides the fact that there definately will be stuff in my heart that needs correcting and changing, I believe that asking this question, accepting the answers and doing something about it is another step in His preparing me for my dream and my purpose.

So, difficult though it might be, I am ready for Dr. God to perform an open-heart surgery on me.

*What does God see in YOUR heart?*

Beware of Dog!

2007-09-23T23:06:00.000+09:30

Beware of Ferocious Samson, guardian of the Oon family home!

Make sure you don't step on him..

Ahhh.... I'm STILL in love with that stupid dog. Looks like it's going to be a serious love affair. He's so tiny! But I think he's put on a bit of weight since I came back seven days ago. Espeacially around the tummy. Coz I feed him. He's having difficulty squeezing through the grill now. And he doesn't walk. He waddles. He waddles and shakes his backside. Waddle waddle shake shake waddle.

hhahahahhaha.

So we've decided that his full name is Samson Oon Fui Keow aka DaRugg (Fui Keow = fat dog in Hakka, DaRugg coz he looks like a rug when he lies down). I give him a scratch till he falls asleep everyday. And he snores. He's such a lazy dog, no wonder he's a fatty fatty bom bom. But I still love him anyway. He's totally stolen my heart. With doggies like Samson, who needs men (sorry guys...).

Muahahahahahaha.

I'm teaching him to kiss me now. Me and only me!

Samson

2007-09-17T14:12:00.000+09:30

I'm in loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Samson Oon, the most beautiful, smarterestest doggy in the whole wide world.

Honestly...

2007-09-11T23:26:00.000+09:30

Aku sudah potong rambut.

Speaking in Malay sounds weird. I like it.

Sometimes I ponder agonizingly over whether or not I should blog about something. I ask myself all kinds of questions before I put it down (otherwise waste two hours typing for nothing lahhh).

Would it be offending to anyone? Would it be too revealing? Would the post tell others a little too much about myself? Do I really want others to know that? Would it make me look weak/vulnerable/arrogant/proud/selfish/needy?

I suppose I could create any impression I want blogging. It's not that hard blogging about something funny or creating an illusion that I'm totally in control of everything. I find the difficult part is to being honest.

Honestly, being honest is not easy. Especially now. I've never really been one to pour my heart out to even the closest of friends. It's not that I don't want to, it's because I don't know how. Or maybe I don't want to seem vulnerable. Either way, it causes a word jam in my throat, I have no idea how to begin and it's exhausting. Other times, when people actually ask me how I'm doing and what's going on, I'm just to tired (or maybe lazy) to explain everything so I just give them a really pleasant smile that I practice in front of the mirror everyday and tell them that I'm good. I'm OK. Everything is OK.

But right now, everything is not bright and peachy. I am not OK. I am struggling. I am struggling with what is happening, I am struggling with how I feel about myself - physically and emotionally. I am struggling with guilt, I am struggling with fear. I am struggling with my walk with God, I am struggling with God.

Yet deep within me I know no matter how i feel and what happens, I am still a child of God. I am his daugther, and because He is King, I'm a princess. I'm HIS PRINCESS. This beautiful thought puts a genuine ear to ear smile on my face and for a moment, I can be honest with myself, and I can be honest with you.

I'm broken, I'm vulnerable, I'm scared. And in this state there is nothing I can do but to give it all to Him.

*relief* :)

In keeping with being honest ----- I cried when I got my haircut. But I'm Ok now. Honest. ;)

Hair Affair

2007-09-03T10:33:00.000+09:30

Would you still love me if I were a bald tomato? My hair is dropping from all the medication lah. But... before I become a tomato botak (I'm not planning to have all of it drop in one day) I can decide to

1. Trim my hair (Obviously, I'd rather not be dropping any hair).
2. Cut it short and hope that I stop shedding.
3. Wear a cap/hat/bandana/scarf/tudung until everything falls off and starts looking really scraggly (Like the bad witch in cartoons where you can see her scalp in places and it looks really gross).
4. Just shave evreything off and pretend it's a fashion statement.
5. Buy all types of wigs and wear hair with different styles and colors everyday.

How?

You know why I never blog for so long?

2007-08-20T14:26:00.000+09:30

Because
My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah. My backside pain ah.

Because my backside pain.

2007-07-22T20:58:00.001+09:30

Bliss = Sparkling wine, chocolate and semi-emo songs before bed.

2007-07-20T08:17:00.000+09:30

Muahahahahahahaha!

Last day of nine to five classes!

Yeah behbee

yeahhhhhhhhh

2007 Mid Year Re-Cap

2007-07-16T20:42:00.000+09:30

There's only one way to describe the past two weeks - madness. So many things happened, so many things to write about. Funny things, stupid things, just the madness of it all. But this here is going to be a 'serious' entry. I'll post a light hearted one soon.

To be truthful, 2007, so far, has been an emotional tailspin. I have been up and down, swerving left and right, right side up, upside down. I wonder how is it that I have yet to fly off my handle and go abit cookoo. Although my mom did mention that arranging M&M's according to color in a jar before eating them is a tad bit weird.

1 kg of M&M's arranged according to color

The beginning of the year started with a flurry of activity. I was back in Aussie more than a month before class started for a Summer Scholarship, which turned out to be almost a total waste of time.

Then classes started. And I was (and still am) the only international student. It was disconcerting to be an outsider. I'm never an outsider, except for a short spell in standard four. Or three. I can't remember. I'll admit that I did have some 'almost no friend' points in my life, like when I started college and started uni, but these times never lasted more than 2 weeks before I found my niche of buddies.

But this year, it was difficult. I couldn't even seem to say anything to anyone. It was morifying at times. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't relate to any of them. It wasn't that I didn't want to. I just couldn't. And it was hard.

So I threw myself into my studies. Pretty soon the excitement of doing an honours research project die out - how long can it last lah... the amount of energy taken to read all those monkey backside journals can send people to the moon already lah..

But time passed. Slowly and painfully. But it did pass. And suddenly, I was hit with revelation upon revelation of God's purpose for me. I knew it was from God, and it was amazing. And in all truthfulness, I have never felt this close to God. Not for a long long time.

Even as this happened, however, there were more questions than answers. When? When God, is it going to happen? How? How is it going to happen? I wanted answers, and I wanted them NOW. How long do I have to wait? I'm ready. Make it happen. Now.

But the answer was No. Not now, not yet. You're not ready. We've still got lots of work to do before you're ready. And after some struggling, I had to agree. I'm still wrestling with things that I know I have to work on. And right now, at this very moment, I'm tired.

I'm tired of the lessons that I have to learn. I want a break, and I just want to crawl under my covers and sleep till the moon turns blue. Because under the covers, sleep is certain. I hate uncertainty.

I've almost never been uncertain of the steps that I've taken in life. I have my plans for the year, my five year plan, heck, I've even got my long term ten year plan. But now, everything is uncertain, because I've decided to follow God's plan instead. And I don't know what's going to happen next. It's unnerving. I know there's nothing to worry about. and nothing worry can do. But I still really really dislike not knowing what my next step is.

Then mom came. And I never realised that I missed my family so much till she came. For two weeks, she made me feel like I was home. Like Adelaide was home. And then she was gone. And the implications of staying long term in Australia hit me. Hard. I barely fit in here with my Aussie classmates, though it's getting better. 99% of my friends are Malaysian students who WILL eventually pack up and go home. Do I really want to stay? Can I really create a new life here? I shudder at the thought of going home to Malaysia only once a year. But yet, I know that my time in Adelaide is not up.

I have also come to realise that I am not ready to have a partner. It sounds cliche, but it's true. Because truthfully, i'd prefer it if I had my very own someone. But I still have too many things about myself that I need to sort out. And this sucks.

However, in the misdt of this all, I have grown much closer to God. Learning, listening, leaning on Him. Struggling most of the time. I have never cried this much before. I've always prided myslef to be strong. No wearing of hearts on my sleeve! The one who is able to do anything, no matter how hard. Not anymore. I need His help.

And help me He has. In many ways. And I know that He's never going thrust upon me anything more than I can handle. And I am glad. Because when God says I can take it, that means I CAN take it.

So, it's been six months of blood sweat and tears, mixed with peace, joy and laughter. I'm on a roller coaster, and God is my seatbelt. When the 2007 ride ends, I'll be glad to bungee jump to my next chapter in life. With God as the bungee rope, of course.

Mummy's gone home

2007-07-14T16:45:00.000+09:30

2007-07-13T09:48:00.000+09:30

Still alive......

Mummy says...

2007-06-20T16:05:00.000+09:30

My mom and two aunts are coming down!!!! WooHoo!! Let me report to you the conversation I had with her on her coming here.

Mom: Hey.. I'm coming down. Booked the tickets already.
Me: Oh.. OK. Er Ee (2nd aunt) coming or not.
Mom: Yeah. And your Sar Ee (3rd aunt) say she also wanna come.
Me: Wah.. so many people. How come all wanna come suddenly?
Mom: Well, don't you think it's about time me and my sisters take a trip together ah?
Me: I suppose so......
Mom: Ya lah, it's about time. We're not that young anymore you know. Better go holiday together before one of us dies.

Aiyoyo... so morbid rite?

Chasing Cheese

2007-06-15T10:28:00.000+09:30

Something to add to my "things to do before 30 list" - Run (or roll) down a super steep hill after a wheel of cheese.

Looks fun no? :D

Wonder if they eat the cheese after they eat it. Hmmmm......

I'm gald to report that I've made headway with the darned essay. I've read a grand total ooooooffffffffffffffffff ONE article. Only to realise that it wasn't related to the topic. *semua orang tepuk tangan* *Hip hip hooray! (x3)*

Ergh so dead

2007-06-13T11:53:00.000+09:30

I am so in trouble. 2000 word essay due on the 18th. A super impossible essay question to answer in just 2000 words. People write WHOLE books on this topic. And the silly lecturer wants me to do it in 2000 words. Lemme show you part of the question.

"Present day psychology is characterized by some psychologists as a rich and varied science in pursuit of a common goal..........At the more extreme end it is seen as 'fractured', by lack of agreement on fundamental philosophical questions (such as epistomology, ontology), with some promoting the strengths of emulating the sciences, and others who feel 'desperate by the human vacumn in its content, and a longing for psychology to embrace problems over which it is possible to feel intellectual passion. Your own position may be one of the above or a variation of thereof. Indicate what you think characterzes psychology today and explain the historical influences (ideas, people, socio-cultural environment) that have shaped it, and what is its future."

That's not even the whole question yet. Seriouslyyyyyyy. How the heck does she want us to write on historical influences, our stand on it and its' future in 2000 words?! Psychology didn't start yesterday lah. It's got years of history and she of all people should know it right??!!

Pissing me off! I can write anything I want and yet still be out of topic. It's like trying to fit one whole semester into one assignment. Siow! Someone is so not gonna get nice teaching evaulations for her class.

Bah... never learnt anything from her except that old people with sagging boobs should wear bras. Especially on cold days. And this was a very visual lesson. I shudder at the memory.

And the essay is not the only thing due! I have a lit review draft to hand in two days after that, and an exam on the 27th. And the I have to get the materials for my research ready on the 28th and the 29th.

And then my mom and two aunties are coming down on the 30th for two weeks. This is the exciting part lah. But it's so stressful lah. I have to finish everything before they arrive, and at the rate I'm going, it seems super impossible. Gilar betul.

Adding to all this is my housemate's sudden interst in the degideroo. Is that how you spell it? I don't even know how to pronouce it. I can say it in my head but I can't say it out loud. But yes, he's taken up that blasted Australian instrument and he sits in the backyard blowing that blasted thing. And all that blasted instrument can do is go 'bbuuuooommmmmm, bbbbuuuuuuoooooommmm' in a very low tone. Bising betul. Oh, did I mention the fact that my bedroom faces the backyard and is right above the place where he sits his nice little backside when he plays that nice little instrument?

Wanna take that thing and break it into 300 pieces and make him swallow all of them. One. By. One.

I've found my future husband. His name is Leonardo Dicaprio. Stop laughing. I WILL marry him.

Memory Lane 1

2007-06-07T21:27:00.000+09:30

I feel nolstalgic. So let's take a walk down memory lane.

LIFE at HELP, '04-'05

Best picture from the 2005 30 hour famine. This is what happens when we don't eat for 30 hours. Esther tries to kiss the camera. I try to lick Esther and Jamie's trying to bite some poor person's finger.

I have antennas!

Group of Lalas. Look at Aaron wei, Everyone doing peace signs he go put finger beside his mouth. Smile until so humsap summore.

But of course no one can beat Jason in the humsap area lah....hehehehe

And this is Shu Hui and I. Just imagine the gilar things we did as housemates. Ahh.. the dinners together. BSC. Bangsar. And who can forget the MidValley incident were the guy makes her order her food in Chinese. Hmmm... I must go look for a picture of Yih Min doing something crazy. She was my other housemate. Loved the time I stayed with both of you.

One of the first few pictures I took in HELP. I look like a kid lah! Ching looks like a kid too :P

I don't care what you say. My hair color was great. GREAT I tell you. GREAT. It was great for the VCD business as well.

Hmmm... Jason trying to do something.

Ai Rene the only normal person in the picture......

Ahahaha.. Nope. Ai Rene not very normal either. All my friends are freaks. Freaks I tell you.

Sigh... Don't ask what I was doing. I'm a freak as well. Hang ten man, hang ten!

More silly pictures to come. Soon.

Showers

2007-06-02T10:40:00.000+09:30

In the summer, I can't wait to hop into the shower coz it's so hot and sweaty.

In the winter, I can't wait to hop into the shower coz it's so freezing cold.

In the summer, I don't wanna get out of the shower coz I'll start sweating again the minute I do.

In the winter, I don't wanna get out of the shower coz I loathe the cold that strikes me the minute I step out of the shower.

No wonder Adelaide has water restrictions..... :p

P/S: If corn oil is made of corn, what is baby oil made of?

Missing home

2007-05-30T15:12:00.000+09:30

I feel antiosocial. I'd rather stay in my room so that I don't have to mumble out a very fake 'Hey, how's it going?' to my housemates. Heh. Antisocial betul.

I just wanna go home. I miss it. Ahhhhh. Tiffany's last post was not much help either. Wanna go home. Wanna go home. WANNA GO HOME :(

Hahahaha... funny!

2007-05-20T20:41:00.000+09:30

Ask!

2007-05-16T21:05:00.000+09:30

Amazing. Time and time again He amazes me. What did He do this time...I've been having some problems recruiting high school students to participate in my research. Mainly because to get the students, we (my supervisor, my research partner and I) have to email high schools, send in our proposals and wait for them to agree to allow their students to take part in my research. Needless to say, they were less than interested in what we proposed and we didn't hear from any of them. Which was not surprising, since the research wouldn't benefit them in any way.

We were getting rather worried because our research totally depended on that sample of participants. And after weeks, they still hadn't even replied to the email. Plus, we had to include the school's in the ethics applications.

So... no permission = no ethics approval = no research = oh no! big trouble = fail honours year = live of my parents forever and ever. Muahahahahahha *evil grin, rubs hands together*

So yes, we were getting worried. THEN, yesterday during OCF prayer meeting, the research project was prayed for and commited to God - just a simple prayer, a humble prayer. Nothing fancy.

And today, TWO out of the four schools contacted us saying that they would be glad to allow their students to take part in my research! After weeks of ignoring our requests! Waahhhh. So cool! Coincidence? I think not.

All I needed to do was to commit it to God. To just ask. And He provided. Wow!

Conversations with Mom

2007-05-08T08:56:00.000+09:30

Mom: Hey, guess what happened.
Me: What?
Mom: Guess lah....
Me: Lazy lah, tell me only la.
Mom: Your brother's prized star tortise died.
Me: Har.. which one? What happened?
Mom: The smallest one. Probably starved to death.
Me: So what did he do with it? I suppose he can't say a prayer and pull the toilet flush like he did to his fishes due to the hard shell.
Mom: Oh no la, he didn't flush it down the toilet.
Me: Then?
Mom: He buried it in the neighbour's flower pot.

And you think I'm weird...